Ada masa

ada masa yang akan ku fikirkan kiranya kau pergi dari ku
bagaimanakah akan ku teruskan tanpa mu
tak sanggup untuk ku bayangkan andainya takdir jauhkan kau dariku
satu yang ku mahu hanyalah, kamu

you

Here I am now sitting thinking about you, nothing but you. I've been spending days and nights with you for almost a month and I never felt so close to someone like it's been with you. you were there, through my roughest, wildest nights, through my most plain nights yet you never left. never found excuses to leave me. being with you, completes my days. i would never want another companion. we've gone through a lot to just walk away and forget. you've had me on my lowest breakdown, you've had me on my loudest tone, and definitely you've had me when i'm being myself. I guess you're starting to see what I am like, and vice versa. knowing you is not a regret though it's never been the best solution. I'm going to miss, sneaking out the house to just get some roti canai, nasi lemak or even McD and eat them while watching the big screen. I'm going to miss, your 'are you okay?' whenever you see me keeping myself shut when we're hanging out. I'm going to miss, snuggling up with you on bed. I'm going to miss, keeping your mouth shut when you talk too much. I'm going to miss, driving your car like mad and have you shouting at my ears. I'm going to miss, all the pillow talks we have while cuddling each other to sleep. I'm going to miss, having you next to me when I wake up and sniffing the morning smell off your forehead. I'm going to miss, going all over the town to find whatever you're craving for and I really think it's pretty cute to watch you eating them full mouthed :) I'm going to miss a lot of things though, from the biggest to the smallest thing. cause to me whatever you're happy doing is making me happy as well. I'm going to love you and I don't think I'll be needing another one anytime soon so just sit back and relax cause you got me right where you want me. just call me whenever, or wherever and I'll be there, through all the storms and weathers. I love you baby.

Pixie Lott - Use somebody

S.U

you opened my heart and you closed it back. you're nothing different than the others. THANKS.

officially missing you

listening to some songs really is reminding me of you. it's almost a year past now but everything about you is still growing in my mind. I miss, sharing the same favourite songs with you. i could listen to any songs, from rock to pop to electro to country songs and even to Micheal Buble and had you singing along with me. we could spend a night together by just downloading clips from Youtube and watch them till we fell asleep. I miss, going out to the town to just eat sushi, and buying groceries for our home. I miss hearing you nagging about the prices, and how we had to cut out some from the list to lower down the budget and you'd do anything even spending nearly hours at a station just to make sure you're buying only the ones needed. I just miss having you taking control of everything. I miss travelling with you. going back to Kl from Kuantan and vice versa just to have your works printed out. I didn't mind wasting my whole day just for you, or for your works. I had the best of time going anywhere with you, to Kl, to Taman Negara, to Kota Bharu, to wherever it was. you pushed everything away just to go with me, just to go wherever I wanted to. you're up for anything, you're the best companion ever. I miss you. I still remember you telling me, no one could ever resist you. now I understand why.. you're the best they could ever ask for, and I am really really glad to have been with you even if it was for a short while.

reminiscing the past

those simple words hit so hard,
they turned my whole world upside down,
girl, you caught me completely off guard,
on that night you said to me,
I just don't love you no more

Jonny Craig

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT?

...

hati masih tak terima ditinggalkan
masih tercari - cari bayangan
aku kehilangan mu

Another truth

I dreamt about you again last night. weird isn't it? how I wished it was for real. but the only real thing here is my tears roll down whenever I think of you, whenever I am in 'your' mood. it's been months, but I seem like running in a circle, running around you. what have you done to me? what have you given me in the past? whenever I tried hooking up, I failed. cause it's always you who appeared at the end of the winning line. I got to admit, you're the best i have ever had. you are the all time winner. but it's okay.. someone once told me, "If they don't want you anymore there is nothing you could do. let go. let them be happy." and so I did. I let go of you out of my life. it's now my time to let go of myself from yours. it's just another lie when I say I don't love you no more.

John Legend - Everybody knows

Random

it's been ages since I last wrote anything down here. got so many to tell but had no words to express. if you guys are wondering, I've been good. getting better is the exact expression. I was on a long rough road ever since I left Kuantan. it wasn't easy, at first. what would you feel when you know you have lost the only thing you have ever loved, the other half of your heart? no words can describe isn't it. you were a lover, a good friend. got to admit, it's really hard for me to let go of you, cause I don't want to, and cause everything seems to be reminding me of you. every move I make, every single thing I do, every song i listen to, everything. but i am learning, really hard. but no matter what happens, there will always be a part of me that loves you eternally. moving on, I worked my ass out for couple of months to get myself back on track. and I finally stepped my feet on one of the places in my travelling list. it was totally fun that it kind of helping me in taking a step away from the rough past. tomorrow will be the very first time of me working in a coffee shop. I wonder how will it be and honestly it's kinda scaring me out since I don't really know what to expect. but I think it'll be fun.. I mean working around food and drinks hehe. well if any of you guys are free, just come around and drop by yeah?

did you know?

how i wished you knew, that i miss the old us. where we were so excited of eachother, so caring about our love. i wonder how we lost them, when we are so truly in love. tell me, how. i remember us being so excited and happy whenever we're meeting eachother, how we wished time wasn't going that fast so we didn't have to say good bye at the end. i miss falling asleep by your side, kissing you all over the places just before closing my eyes, waking up to your side with you hugging me, kissing your cheeks and smell the morning smell of yours on your forehead. i miss too, making love to you with our sexy moves and ended them up cuddling and laughing together about our things. i miss laying down on bed with you everynight, without doing anything but just lay down and feel the warmth of your body. do you remember how we used to watch scary movies at night, just the two of us with food all over the floor? it's just so different now. you used to crawl down and snug beside me whenever you saw me laying down. you used to play songs with your guitar for me. you used to lay your head on my lap when you saw me on computer. we used to have fun in the bathroom together, and went out for dinner with smiles on our faces, left people wondering why. we used to irritate everyone around us with our happiness. looking at you now on your desk, reminds me of nothing but my deep love for you. we were just so good. nothing bad, no tears no harm, just love and laughs. i just miss all those small things we used to do. time is running so fast now and we don't have much time to just let it pass without spending it. how i wished you knew sayang, how i wished you knew the reason of me being here. i am here, for you. no other reasons.

just for you

do you know that i am crazy for you? i sayang you sangat-sangat, i can never imagine myself without you. sounds cliche kan, but i can't lie, that's what i am really feeling towards you. it is so real and true i hardly believe it myself. i am listening to slow songs, reminding me of our slow night before. you, me and smooth slow songs, nothing else. how we wished we were next to eachother, falling onto our backs with arms cuddling around eachother. i can't wait to start my days with you. i know, me going there to you isn't a bad move at all since that's what i've been wanting for a long time, since that's what i need to complete my days. you tau i tak boleh berpisah dengan you, tak boleh berjauhan dengan you even for a day or else i akan meragam. i hate it, i hate it for hurting you just because i want you. it's just plain stupid. but i can't help it b. i want you so much that i just need you next to me all the time. the thoughts of what's going to happen in the future are hurting and killing me inside but i know that you are always going to be there for me for as long as you live. so i am going to leave the sad thoughts aside for now and enjoy my every bit with you. i love you. i know you do too. and i know you do it like no one else does.

now and never

I finally know just what it means to let someone in to see the side of me that no one does or ever will, so if you're ever lost and find yourself all alone, i'd search forever just to bring you home..

what patience brings you

remember how i used to be all fucked up because of you? how i didn't sleep at night, how i never had dry eyes, how i had my heart fighting for you every night, wondering what was best for me, and what was best for you. hard to believe how i kept my 6 months for you, kept everything off it's way just for you, just for us. how i waited for your text every second, how i waited for night to begin just to hear your voice, how i always wondered how you were doing back then. now everything is paid off. God has listened to my prayers, and finally sacrifices His little time to grant my wish. i have you now. i have you with me now. i have you just for my own now and never. i am never asking more. why am i, when the only thing i ever want is all mine. saying how happy i am won't be enough, will never be enough. i get to see you everyday, i get to talk to you every minute i want, i get to have you every second. my 6 months wait is worth a lifetime. ILY b. more than ever now. :)

why does it feel so right

cause i miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
and i breathe you, into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
cause i love you, whether it's wrong or right
and though i can't be with you tonight, you know my heart is by your side

torn

a part of me wants to leave you alone.
a part of me wants for you to come home.
a part of me says i'm living a lie,
and i'm better off without you.
a part of me says to think it through.
a part of me says I'm over you.
a part of me wants to say goodbye.
a part of me is asking why...
a part of me wants to leave.
but a part of me wants to be here with you.
and everytime i think we're over and done you do something to get me back loving you.
and you got me just torn.
torn in between the two.
cause i really want to be with you.
but something's telling me i should leave you alone
there were no issues when we started out.
it was cool.
it was everything that love's about.
but something happened.
plus i'm feeling so burnt out.
i can't understand you now
a part of me says it's all my fault.
a part of me says "they ain't what you want."
a part of me says to get my bags.
a part of me says i can't do that.
so many times i... i was ready to go.
so many times i... i had my foot out the door
so many times I... i thought to give you a chance, thought you'd be a better person
now i'm sitting here and i'm so confused.
cause i keep fighting myself for you.
i don't know how much more i can take but i can't feel this way
you just got me so torn

bidadari

dengarkanlah wahai bidadari
seandainya kau sudi
walaupun kau tak mungkin cintai diri ini
namun aku mahu kau tahu
setiap malam kau ku rindu
walaupun terluka kau masih ku cinta

the truth

i know you inside out
i know all your curves and swerves
i know every mark and scar on you
i have seen you in ways like nobody has
there is no reason for me to not want you more than anything else
i love you like no else does.

meh

why am i so feeling-less right now? tak suka ah.
maybe im already tired and done of all these craps and shits
you punya pasal la ni. look what you've done darling..

full time lover

they say, being in love is sharing deep unexplainable feelings with someone. someone who cherishes you the most, someone who doesn't mind spending their most precious time over your tiny littlest thing, someone who doesn't think you're ugly, instead the prettiest person all the time even on your baddest day. someone who laughs at your stupidest jokes, and someone who doesn't see what anyone can see, in anyone else but you. im not sure whether it's real, but i feel these all the time towards you. unbelievable but true. i am never bored of you, even for the tiniest bit. i never want to stop seeing, and being beside you even silence is all we could have. i've had your face next to mine when you're talking, laughing, starring and even sleeping, never a moment where i could stop having my eyes on it. it doesn't have the weight of the world you're carrying on your shoulder instead it's the most peaceful view i've ever seen. i just dont know what to think anymore, what i have for you is crazy and, i think i am your ever biggest fan.
The Moldy Peaches - anyone else but you is for you

a wishful wish

alangkah indahnya kalau kau ini milik aku seorang..
memang aku lah insan paling bahagia di dalam dunia ini